Believers Blessings

One of the things blogging has done for me is that it has opened some friendship doors for me. I am the kind of person that would rather be on my own, than hang out with a crowd, and my job doesn’t really afford me the opportunity to meet people. So my chances of making new friends are quite limited. But with blogging, I have been able to meet like-minded and faith-full people, who have been a source of support, and inspiration. I know that there are days when, no matter how much faith you have, you will ask certain questions like “what’s the point?”, or “what difference does it make anyway?” it is in those moments that the beauty of friendship is better defined – be it virtual or physical.

Today, I want to appreciate the blogger and my very own cheer-reader, Believer. In more ways than one, her posts have been a source of inspiration, but the one that stands out most is her faithfulness in believing prophecy. I think that alone has gone a long way in shaping my life this year.

You see, I have grown used to attending cross-over services at the end of each year, and awaiting the preacher make a declaration of God’s will and plan for the New Year. And yes, we believe and go into the New Year with expectation, but for many including myself, the days turn into weeks into months and the demands of life tend to make those prophecies sound like faraway pep talk.

But with Believer, she has consistently reminded me that God doesn’t forget his prophecies. Almost everyone of her posts this year has ended with the reminder that “ 2008 continues to remain our year of UNCOMMON TESTIMONIES.” That’s the prophecy she got and she has made a deliberate and conscious effort to walk in this word. That’s great inspiration for me.

I was going through some of my previous posts and I realized how much this blog has been about the fight of my life(*grin*…I finally got my long awaited Kirk Franklin CD, Fight of my Life, and couldn’t resist using the title….i think it rocks). And for me in my ministry, the prophecy for 2008 is that it is a year of fulfillment. For the first half of this year, I kind of just trudged along hoping I could smile at the end of the year and say yes, I walked in that fulfillment. But honestly, it is probably a prophecy I would have quickly forgot, but thanks to Believer who kept reminding me of her own prophecy.

You know, one thing I have learned is that faith is not automatic. There is some amount of work you have to do. The preacher could give you God’s word for you, and it’s all true and everything, but there is a certain homework you have to do if you will be seeing that prophecy play out in your life. Joshua lets us see a little of how this works, when God instructed him not to forget the book of the law. The word is effective, but we must not forget it; we must learn to activate it in our lives, by a conscious belief, meditation and confession.

Pastor Chris once explained the image in revelation of Jesus with a sword in his mouth that it was symbolic of the word of God, the Hebrew word used there, meaning “edge of a weapon”. The word of God in our mouth is like the edge of a weapon that cuts through the distractions of the enemy and activates the promises of our Father.

This is what Believer has been doing every time she ends up her post with the reminder “ 2008 continues to remain our year of UNCOMMON TESTIMONIES.” And it has also activated the prophecy in my life because I did not forget.

A Gay Sermon

this isn’t supposed to be funny, but i can’t help laughing! hello! can somebody please read the end of the bible story?

Title; “Coming Out To Intimacy”
© Rev Rowland Jide Macaulay, 11th Nov 2007.
Pastor, House Of Rainbow MCC, Lagos Nigeria.

Preached at achurch4me MCC Chicago USA.

Hallelujah, Glory to God.
V I have had many moments of coming out.
V Most of them good, relieve, great, some are painful, shameful, stigmatised linked with denial, rejection, isolation etc
V But when we live in the hope of the almighty God, we are destined to know the truth, see the light, and breathe the air of freedom, liberation and validation.
V And the only way we can do that is to arrive at the truth, the inclusive gospel of Jesus Christ, which has no boundaries or restrictions or conditions.

We can boldly say “We fight the good fight of faith, laying hold of the eternal life to which we are summoned we confess the good confession before many witnesses” 1 Timothy 6v12.

The Title of my message this morning is Coming Out to Intimacy

Please, Bow your head and let us pray;
Loving God, the most excellent God, we are grateful for our gathering today, a day you have made, anointed and blessed, a day you have set aside for your name to be glorified, your name to be magnified, for us to fellowship and share in the inclusiveness of Jesus Christ and the love of our eternal God.

Someone say Amen, I invite you all friends, members and visitors of achurchforme and Sankofaway in Chicago to say Amen. It is good to be in Chicago again, last I was here in June, dancing on the Gay Pride. I want to acknowledge other ministry gifts, the music from Free Spirit, Drum DIVAS are Divinely inspired Victoriously Anointed. Amen.

I want to thank your Pastor Rev Kevin Downer a dear friend of mine and his partner Toby and the board members for the invitation to preach today, Also many thanks to Rev Deborah Lake and her partner Terri. I am a man under law and a mission, I know I have been given the privilege of a few minutes to talk to you. Just before I do that, I also bring you greetings all the way from House Of Rainbow MCC, Lagos Nigeria. Where I believe God is doing new and great things, someone say Amen.

The reading today is an interesting story for the lesbian and gay community Ruth 1v14-18.

A whole family moves from Bethlehem to Moab because of famine, the father dies, the sons marry Moabite wives, ten years later, the sons die and three women, Naomi, the mother in law and Ruth and Orpah are left widowed and childless.

There are only two ways a woman could be valued in this society, as an unmarried virgin in her father’s household or as a child-producing wife in her husbands, nothing has change with the expectation of society today. Naomi recognized that they have limited options for relationships and places of security in such a society, she tells her daughters in law to go back to their homeland and find new husbands. Just imagine the stigma, the shame, the rejection and isolation. Orpah kissed Naomi goodbye, but Ruth Clings to her. It was at this point that Ruth Comes Out and declares her true feelings for Naomi.

We must find a point to declare our true feelings for our relationships, to be honest and true.
We must find a point to declare our love for God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit
We must find a point to declare our love for each other and our neighbors
We must find a point to declare our coming to express and live the inclusive love and gospel of Jesus.

Ruth speaks to Naomi;

‘Do not press me to leave you or to turn back from following you! Where you go, I will go; where you lodge, I will lodge; your people shall be my people and your God my God. 17Where you die, I will die— there will I be buried. May the Lord do thus and so to me, and more as well, if even death parts me from you!’18When Naomi saw that she was determined to go with her, she said no more to her.

This is the great coming out to intimacy moment, I am sure many of us have had that experience or that journey, Coming out as who we are is revolution and a victory, coming at work and to our families are just important, but coming out to yourself first and reconciling spirituality and sexuality is paramount.
Ruth chooses against the odds to stay with Naomi, one worthless woman joining herself to another and in her choosing she refuses to accept the status quo of a society that limits and defines their existence as worthless, empty and marginal based on marital status or reproductive ability.

Ecclesiastics 4:9-12 says Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. 10For if they fall, one will lift up the other; but woe to one who is alone and falls and does not have another to help. 11Again, if two lie together, they keep warm; but how can one keep warm alone? 12And though one might prevail against another, two will withstand one. A threefold cord is not quickly broken.

Ruth is our queer ancestress, she has gone before us and so offers us an example. In her own way she knew that silence equals death. After all Orpah says nothing, she simply kissed Naomi and said goodbye.

Micah 6v8 “O ye mortal, what is good and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice and to love kindness and walk humbly with your God?”

Ruth courageously name and affirm our relationship in the face of insurmountable odds. This is doing justice and loving kindness. She provides us with an example of self determination, refusing to accept a marginalized status based on heterosexist patriarch definition of marriage, family and procreation.

After all the bible remind us in 1 Peter 2:9-10 But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s own people,* in order that you may proclaim the mighty acts of God who called you out of darkness into God’s marvelous light. 10Once you were not a people, but now you are God’s people; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.

Psalm 23 is my Coming Out passage and Rev Troy Perry the founder of MCC wrote a book titled The Lord Is My Shepherd And He Knows Am Gay. Here we need to learn to rewrite our history into the scriptures, here we are standing on the inclusive love, promise and gospel of Jesus Christ.

Ruth’s words to Naomi 1:16 are words for our community.

I am not sure how many people know about Nigeria or of Nigeria. Currently to be homosexual is a crime and there are laws to prosecute, imprison anyone convicted for up to 14 years. But we have a church. We speak the words of Ruth to Jesus. The church started in September 2006.

We have held regular worship in Nigeria in just over one year and there has been no disruptions of any kind by hoodlums or the authorities.

We have grown in numbers; over 1,500 people statistically have attended all our programmes.

We have exceeded 300 on our main contact database.

In the last six months we average minimum 60 to almost 90 people in attendance with about 20 to 25% new people in attendance.

I want to invite all of you into a Ruth Naomi relationship with the congregation in Nigeria.
Support our mission to help many Nigerian gays and lesbians reconcile sexuality with spirituality.
18 men stand trial in my country for charges ranging from sodomy to cross dressing and impersonating women. Last June on the pride march I wore a shirt with an inscription L.I.F.E, living in fear everyday, this is happening here in Chicago and in Nigeria right now.

Prophet Isaiah said in Chapter 41v10, “I fear not, for God is with me. I do not look around in terror and be dismayed, for God is my God. God will strengthen and harden me to difficulties, yes, God will help me, yes, God will hold me up and retain me with God’s right hand of rightness and justice”. Prophet Isaiah like many of us today had something to say, make a note of these proclamations, and have faith in God.

God Bless You all. End

Beauty of a Boo

this title was just to slick for me to pass up, and even though i have not had the time to do an article with it, i couldn’t resist putting it up. so you know this blogger is still in the game of blogging and loving. and i will be here ASAP to update you guys.

MTN Text message:
N150 was transferred to you from *Novia* on 28/07/08 15.14 via Share & Sell.

Sometimes, its the little things that count.

PS:
A prayer for Pea: Because divine health is the heritage of the new creation, every fibre in your body and every cell in your blood and every bone in your body is perfected in wholeness.

When Work is Fun

‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:09 PM]:
ayo
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:09 PM]:
yes
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
pls tell b*** s**** wants him
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
ok
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
he shoiuld pls come with his system
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
ok
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
and i love u
dats me to u
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
i love u too…lol…ofcourse
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
will see u soo
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:10 PM]:
see u soon….am hungry sha
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:11 PM]:
soon
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:11 PM]:
ok

Anniversary Ideas and PS!

Paula commented about me referring to my girlfriend with initials as impersonal. well, i cannot use her real name as am not sure she is totally comfortable with me blogging about her life, and since am not very enlightened in the Nigerian language, i decided to use the Spanish word for girlfriend, the first letter of which is incidentally the first letter of her name. So from henceforth, Novia=N.

i was working on another post for today, but am yet to complete it. Novia and I are presently on a flat note. We have had some little skirmishes – disagreement in some matters – which i think is healthy and a good sign(although it terribly messes up my emotions) that we are not too lovey-dovey and mushy-mushy to ignore the little differences in opinions. so the post was to be about lessons am learning in working a relationship. hopefully it should be ready by tomorrow.

However today, my ladies, i need your help. in two days, it will be our one month anniversary, and i would like to do or give Novia something special. my options are limited considering its a Wednesday and a service day, and since Pastor Chris is in town, she will most likely be working with the camera crew, and we won’t have so much time together. so am asking for gift ideas to celebrate one month of my first relationship. since Novia is aware of my blog, and pops in now and then, all suggestions should please be sent to my mailbox ayomipo[at]gmail.com. Thanks peeps.

PS: So that all of BlogVille may know, i finally told Novia, and am telling you all here: I Love Novia!

PSS:
Novia‎‎ [11:02 AM]:
baby u there?
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [11:09 AM]:
hello
‎‎Novia‎‎ [11:10 AM]:
hello?
??????????
r u upset or something?
????????????????\
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [11:11 AM]:
am here, but my emotions are still a little messed up. pls give me some time to clear my head so that i dont hurt you deliberately or unconsciously. i love you, i just need to deal wit my emotions right now. please.
‎‎Novia [11:12 AM]:
ok bye
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [11:12 AM]:
i’ll call you.

PSSSS:
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:44 PM]:
buzz
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [2:44 PM]:
hi sweeheart
thnk u
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:45 PM]:
hi
4?
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [2:45 PM]:
4 being sweet, and understanding and so loveable
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:45 PM]:
sounds like me
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [2:45 PM]:
thats why i thank God that i got you
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:46 PM]:
great
sorry 4 acting up
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [2:46 PM]:
am sorry 4 acting up too
so hw av u been?
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:47 PM]:
k
noticing ur not calling me and talking to me
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [2:48 PM]:
its cos of how much i love you
i didnt want to take a chance of hurting you with my words
until i was sure i could respond beyond my emotions
but i missed u every second
i just have some growing up to do in my emotions
sorry
and thnks for understanding
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:53 PM]:
its ok
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [2:53 PM]:
ok. hv u eaten?
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:54 PM]:
doughnut cake n a drink.
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [2:54 PM]:
they served us lunch. wat abt urs?
‎‎Novia‎‎ [2:57 PM]:
i guess my office assistant isnt ready yet.
5 mins pls
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:01 PM]:
k
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:11 PM]:
back
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:11 PM]:
ok
so u got lucnh now?
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:13 PM]:
not yet
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:15 PM]:
sorry
hows ur work going?
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:16 PM]:
ok

‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:20 PM]:
ok, hey need to do sum stuff now, can i buzz u later?
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:22 PM]:
k
‎‎Ayomipo Edinger‎‎ [3:22 PM]:
i love u. ALWAYS
‎‎Novia‎‎ [3:22 PM]:
me too

Songs of Ayomipo

Thank you to everyone who showed me some love, support and strength yesterday. It’s good to know that God has people who are ready to cheer us. Thanks and may you be comforted as you have comforted me.

Book One: Text messages from me to N.

1. I think about you all the time. I miss u. I wish we were together. U mean a lot to me.
2. U r my woman, my melody, my rhythm, my movie star, my treasure map, my delight, my laughter, my beauty, my desire; just thought to remind you how you do me.
3. Are you ok? Just checking. Your boyfriend said to tell you that you are a big part of his world and he is grateful for your presence and he misses you much and he wishes you joy today.
4. Am glad to know you are feeling better. Here’s a hug to keep you warm. And a kiss too.
5. Hope you are feeling better? Let me know if you need anything. Be strong my sweets.
6. I pray for you that your steps will be ordered this week, and you will function in excellence and wisdom, and you will be commended for faithfulness. I care about you a lot. Have a fulfilling day.
7. Am lying in bed thinking about you. I want to say something to you but don’t know what to say. Still I can’t get you off my mind. Thanks for trusting me tonight, for caring, for teaching me stuff.
8. It took me 27 years to meet you but now I know it was worth the wait and I thank God I got you.
9. How do I even begin to say how much I cherish you. Your smile inspires. Your attitude excites. Your personality warms. All of you just makes my feet tap-dance. I cherish you.
10. You are my girl and am proud to be your guy.
11. I have never felt like I could knock out superman before. I guess its because you are in my life. You make me feel super strong.
12. Today you made me realize that I cannot afford to lose you.
13. You decorate my life and each time I think of you its like fireworks go off in my world.Thank God I got you.
14. You make me feel like am ten feet tall.
15. You a re on my mind and in my heart.
16. Am sorry about this morning. I wouldn’t deliberately hurt you. I guess I was groggy-eyed and had cobwebs in my head. Sowwie sweets.
17. Your company was simply a delight. I could relive the moments for a lifetime. I am glad I have you in my life.
18. I think about you more than I plan to. I hear your voice even when you have stopped talking. I enjoy your presence even after you are gone. I dream of you even when I am awake. I must be tripping for you.
19. With each day I run out of words to describe the pure joy you create in my world.
20. I think about you with smiles on my face and laughter in my heart because you came into my world like melody to lyrics, you are my fave new song.
21. You warm my heart with each moment I spend with you.
22. Even at odd hours of the night you are on my mind,
23. When you cross my mind I want to pinch myself because it feels like a dream having you in my life.

Learning to Love

I really like N and with each day, I believe I am learning to love her. But I still haven’t told her I love her. I almost did the other day while talking on the phone, but I caught myself just in time. Perhaps you wonder why I would hesitate to express love to her. Maybe it is because for the very first time in my life I realize that I am not a teenager looking for a love affair. My BF tells me all the time that we are not of the world and our relationships should not be one of trial and error. We don’t date to decide. We decide to date because we have been divinely guided. Once, God told me I must learn to choose by direction, and not by attraction.

N is my first ever girlfriend, and this is my first ever relationship. In most of my 27 years, I have dreamed and longed for a girlfriend, many thanks to the Hollywood stories I grew up on. I went through the university watching my roomies and friends hook up and break-up, and in spite of the fact that the one girl they said was their life changed after a while, I was still enamored about having a girlfriend, and I tried, and they tried, to hook me up. But it seems like God put a tag on my fore-head that said “Touch not!” because all the girls I liked, all liked me but not enough to date me. It looks to me like God was saving me for some other plan and purpose.

So my thoughts are, if God has a greater purpose and plan for my relationship, then the last thing I want to do is make a mistake. I am aware that I am a little vulnerable now, because I had unconsciously resigned myself to being single for a very long time, so I may just be responding to N’s love out of appreciation. I want to guard against that. With each day, I realize that she’s too special to deserve less than total and true love. I want to be able to give her that. And because I am slowly allowing myself to shed away the “diva-images” I had cooked up for my girlfriend, I am daily beginning to see N for all the treasure and beauty that she is and could be. And I am learning to love.

You know, being an only child, I grew up thinking the only person that mattered was me. And though I don’t believe I am a selfish person, I do realize that I could be self-centered sometimes. Not deliberately though. I could be giving, but perhaps only because of what I wanted to receive. But with N, I find myself having to compete and match-up with her affection. We have an undeclared battle presently of who gives the other more. N likes to do stuff for me, and get stuff for me. She delights in surprising with unexpected gifts for special reason. And I find myself deliberately trying to match that. Many times in the past, I did stuff for the girls I liked because I was trying to get them to like me back. But this time, it’s different. It’s kind of like what scripture describes as “We love Him because he first loved us”.

I do not usually find it hard to tell the ones I love that I love them. But I want to be absolutely sure that when I tell N I love her, it is not because of passion or emotion, but because it is total and true. Because it is divine and destined. N deserves nothing less.